Wednesday, June 3, 2015

Fufillment

Lately I have been feeling fulfilled and what a wonderful state of being that is. Life is simple days at home interspersed with meeting friends and exploring local places as a family. These are the days that I dreamed of as a wee girl reading the stories of Enid Blyton and Laura Ingalls Wilder. Snuggled under the covers imagining having my own home and filling it with children.

Our house is no romantic seaside cottage or log cabin on a vast prairie but it is our happy nest. One day with hard work it will be more attractive; warmer, drier and the gardens more established. In the meantime I will continue to be grateful that we worked so hard to afford the deposit. We can see that our first place is not our dream home...not even close! Yet it is making our dreams come true and with frugality and patience we inch our way towards that acre or two where we will grow our family.

It can be repetitive being a stay at home Mum but I like that. I enjoy the gentle rythm of seasons and daily routines. I don't feel 'stuck' at home or lonely. My favourite moments are often in the weekend when the three of us are out walking on a beach or enjoying family time at home. It's not for everyone for sure but for us it works. 

It is an opportunity for Mae to have a solid grounding for life and for us to have a productive garden and minimal household costs. Of course there are moments when I miss my job as a nurse helping people toward recovery. The teamwork, challenges and all the vitality that the health realm brings. However I am right where I want to be at this point in time. Home with my girl. I am her sun and she my moon. 

Little Cublet's teeth made a brief appearance (the bottom two) and then disappeared! She has begun drooling a lot again today so I am hoping they will pop through to stay in the coming days/weeks. Watching her change and grow brings me such pleasure.  She sits and plays happily for longer periods and is enjoying some new-to-her toys I purchased second hand. She loves anything with wheels she can spin and push back and forth. Jumping in her Jolly Jumper is done with much enthusiasm and her joy is infectious. Her little voice is strong and clear and laughter bubbles over with ease. Little chuckles turn into belly giggles. Oh little ones are such a delight. 

Winter hit this week with force; driving rain, cool temperatures and spectacular thunderstorms. It has meant that we have spent most of our time indoors but the weather forecast seems to be looking good for the weekend. The lawn is a sodden mess turning to muddy slush as soon as you place a foot on it. Gumboots are a necessity. Washing is cluttering the spare room as it slowly dries. 

We are saving for a heat pump to warm and hopefully dry out the house this winter. Every morning I wipe down the windows as they are fogged with condensation. There is mould creeping across our bedroom ceiling again making me very grateful that Mae's room is warm and insulated. The heat pump installation and finishing up renovating the toilet and hallway are planned for sometime soon. Slowly but surely the house is starting to reflect our taste. 

May had so many incredible sunrise and sunsets. Autumn light has such beauty. The wonderful ability to turn everyday objects into beautiful vignettes. Making the most of the Autumn we ventured to Newmarket on the train for a wonderful afternoon with a gentle soul and treasured cousin, explored Bethalls Beach for the first time, dined Italian style on the waterfront with dear friends and more. June is looking to be busy with friends and family coming to stay. 

The dark and cold of winter has made it hard to love for me but as the years pass I have come to be fond of the cosiness that such weather brings. Time to craft and snuggle...and in our family a chance to snack on popcorn, hot drinks steaming on the coffee table while we enjoy a T.V series. Oh winter perhaps you aren't so bad after all.

Snug as a bug




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